I of course grant that you have some sort of indescribable feeling. I just don't understand why any of us should think your feelings correspond to any other aspect of reality. In particular, it's just like the children who "don't sleep"...they report the sensation of not being asleep, because whenever they're awake, they're awake. If you report that you're always "aware" in a sense, despite no ability to show that this means anything, and in the face of lots of evidence that you're not, doesn't it seem more plausible that you're making the I-don't-sleep mistake?