What do you mean by "is racist" here?

Also, I'm not sure this is true unless we're assuming the target uniformly assumes bad faith, and isn't that a lot more likely if we fail to use language to distinguish systematically hateful behavior and occasionally oblivious or stereotype-embracing behavior?

Personally, it hurts when someone steps on my foot, but it makes a huge difference whether they're careless or whether they did it on purpose, and keep going after my feet even when I'm not near them.